Enough... (Day 33)
John 15:5 I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
Enough was the word that came to me in the quiet still this morning. I am certain it was offered as a reminder that no matter the amount of sleep I get (or don't) that God has given me enough for the day ahead.
I remember at one point in young motherhood, when sleep was so often elusive as I sat up in the night with one babe or another. Someone somewhere said this thing. God gives us enough. Enough sleep. Enough energy. Enough to make it through.
A few years ago, I was at a conference that Priscilla focused in on the vine and branches verses. I remember thinking, jotting down and believing that God was speaking into my heart an answer to a job change. Yes - if you remain in me and I remain in you - this will be good. It will be "easy." Seriously when I read that I wonder how in the world I could have thought that. I was living through a really tough time. Struggling through crisis. Trying to figure out how to get through each day. Why did I see "enough" as "easy?" Remaining tied to the vine wasn't easy. It was enough.
Later in that year, as the struggle continued even with the job change, I realized that Jesus said nothing in that verse about easy. It says if I remain in Him and He remains in me there will be fruit produced. Otherwise - NOTHING. When I looked over the year and the times in which I remained tied, anchored and soul connected to Jesus could I see the fruit? Sure. Some. Mostly, I had to trust there was planting and tending and growth happening too. Because often "enough" is not really noticeable. When we are getting by each day, it can be a struggle to recognize enough.
It is only two years later. Two years in which the tears that have been wept have washed and cleansed and allowed for healing to begin. I can see that even though waiting in the hope of enough was often a struggle - I had enough to make it through. Enough willingness to try to trust again. Enough heart space for hoping.
God is enough. He promised it. You are enough. You are His.
Today, I am grateful for the snow that will provide outside play time for my children, enough for today and my drooping eyelids after a night with enough sleep.